I struggled for years trying to gain and keep balance in my life. Many of the things that I was tied to were things that involved the happiness of someone else. I was never really doing the things that I enjoyed or were passionate about to my best ability. I, as well as my son were always on the back burner. He took the bench to priorities that were seemingly important to me and my balance took the bench to things I deemed more important.
Then I had a revelation ...
Unapologetic "Me" Time
Those three words have been my saving grace.
I can definitely say that it makes some people uncomfortable, unhappy and a bit confused about my sanity and even my christianity for that matter. But let me tell you about all of the things that I've gained with living by those three words.
- I'm not as stressed about being everywhere and doing everything for everybody
- I live life on my own terms
- I do the things that I want to do and say NO to the things that I don't
- I have more leisure time
- I spend more time with the kiddo getting drinks at Starbucks, watching things that he wants to watch and chatting about random things
- I have time to just THINK. It's the greatest gift I've been given as an introvert. The time to wake up in the morning and THINK. Surprising huh?
I may have moments when I feel guilty, but then I think about a few things like,
- The moments I missed out on because I was planning the next big thing that I just HAD to do.
- The time I didn't spend in my word or learning something new
- The time that I wasn't spending writing
- Or sipping coffee, or taking a walk at the park, or being a better human.
This took me a while, in fact it took me almost 30 years to get to the place where I was unapologetic about my "me" time; my need for renewal, balance and my sanity.
I don't plan to turn back to life as it was, but I plan to live on purpose, seeking God for what I should and should not do and being more conscious about how I treat myself and others. One thing I do understand is that you cannot get blood from a turnip and it takes sustenance to be able to give it to others. I could not give what I was not giving to myself.
It's not for everybody and not everyone will agree with my sentiments, but I'm determined to live and that starts with taking care of myself. Same for you, whatever that looks like.
Bold. Balanced. Authentic.